Anarking

Notes To self 3 (nts3) pompadour kitten noises s:3

Around the sametime myfriends took to selfreplicatin
Is around the same time i took to self medicatin

Its important to stumble down a hallway with a bottle of patron a least once in a mans life

7 billion people, fucken shit there needs to be a topical ointment for controlling outbreaks of huminization. We could sell that shit to earth and mars.

Fuck all loud lowflying aircraft to day.

Most people that say never forget are the ones who dont have to remeber living it.

The internet: daily reminding you just what an unoriginal fucker you truely are, free of charge.

Guys Night Out

“Guys Night Out” is a reveille were men simultaneously revel in and revile each others genital measurements. Since retreating to the suburbs and making many gringo friends I have been invited to numerous guys night outings, yet have been to a few and actually wished I was with my woman during all of them. I don’t quite get the whole theory behind married guys hanging out with each other simply because they are married or in a relationship. My woman is my best friend, for reals. I spend more time with here than a do with anyone else so why would I not want to invite my best friend to hand with me and my other friends. I get it that she is a chick and so her labia forbids her from enjoying certain blood sports or types of alcohol but still she at least should be invited right? I mean how would you feel if you dog had dogs night out where you couldn’t come because even though he is mans best friend you lack the proper butt sniffing etiquette and so are not welcome. That would be total bullshit. You’d be all like, “Hey, fuck you dog.” But your dog is always happy to hang with you even is there are other dogs around because he thinks you are the the goddamn bees knees!

Now some of my readers may be all like, “dude you compared your wife to your dog”.

“Fuck you buddy” I say to that. My dog rules as does my wife and I can only hope to be as loyal to her as my dog is to me.

The point is that guys night out is dumb. I don’t want to be a part of your cockachino brofest if I can’t bring my betty along. Sheit it goes beyond that too, I have chick friends who are way cooler than many on the dickholes I met at guys night outs. These girls can outsling beers, outlewd comment and out bro and of your brosephs. Hell these brosephines make guys night out more fun then strap-on wielding monkeys let loose in a nunnery. So yeah send your gender segregated dick fest invites to you frat brothers, if I can’t bring my bleeders then I ain’t coming.

Notes to self 2

A Fist full of Fists would hurt a lot more then just a fist i reckon but will never be taken seriously as a new movie for John Wayne, partly because John Wayne is dead…I think…they named an airport after him. I think you have to be dead to have an airport named after you, and since no body names airplanes after real people your name will never fly until after you are dead.

If someone pissed you off kicking shrubs is acceptable.

You can make an angel out of practically anything but a snow angel is the only one people think are cute, unless they are cuban mafiosos or strippers the you can add coke angels to the list.

Punk Rock makes your arguments invalid

Recently the anarchist’s on face book started debating guns and I realized that these fuckers aren’t anarchists but hippy liberal pinkos who read outdated books and treat life like try hard students trying to get an A in a political philosophy lecture. Any ways most Anarchist debates have been settled by Punk Rock.

Government Subsidized Public Services:

Gun Control:

Need for the Police

Government Subsidized Public Education

Textbook Salvation

I sat in your classroom and listened to you say
Resign your mind to what’s assigned and learn to think our way
Consume this useless data and repeat it back to me
Incorporate; regurgitate: Straight A philosophy

You are the system the red, white and blue
The lies you are teaching now start to show through

Speak only when you’re spoken to and never raise your voice
Implant submission in the youth while they still have no choice
Input equals output, bullshit in means bullshit out
A wealth of worthless facts won’t help you find what life’s about

You are the system we hold in contempt
And we close our minds to the lies you present

Textbook Salvation: calculated imagination
Textbook Salvation: we’ll accept no deviation
Textbook Salvation: you call this an education?
Textbook Salvation: mandatory suffocation…

I defy your backwards system, and shout my heresies
Education through life’s frustration exposed your inadequacies
Input equals output, nothing in means nothing out
If you can’t teach about real life, then what are we learning about?

You are the system which we attack
While you stand behind us you stab us in the back.

(lyrics: Al Ouimet)

Politicians (ALL OF THEM NOT JUST THE ONES YOU DON’T CHEER FOR)

Lyrics: 

Inflammable material is planted in my head
It's a suspect device that has left 2000 dead
Their solutions are our problems
They put up the wall
On each side time and prime us
And make sure we get fuck all
They play their games of power
They mark and cut the pack
They deal us to the bottom
But what do they put back?

(Chorus)
Don't believe them
Don't believe them
Don't be bitten twice
You gotta suss, suss, suss, suss, suss out
Suss suspect device

They take away our freedom
In the name of liberty
Why don't they all just clear out
Why don't they let us be
They make us feel indebted
For saving us from hell
And then they put us through it
It's time the bastards fell

(Chorus)

Don't believe them
Don't believe them
Question everything you're told
Just take a look around you
At the bitterness and spite
Why can't we take over and try to put it right

(Chorus)

We're a suspect device if we do what we are told
But a suspect device can score an own goal
I'm a suspect device the Army can't defuse
You're a suspect device they know they can't refuse
We're gonna blow up in their face

Illegal / legal immigration

Notes to self

Jimmy macaroons is not a great mafia name, it lacks intimidation and just makes me think of nuts.

Learl - reading something on the computer and actually laughing in an audible fashion not just typing LOL. If you wish to convey this message online you should use LIRL or laughing in real life.

Procrasticleaning - when you should doing work other then house work. If you are procrasticleaning fro house work I would not sweat it.

Where have I been all summer

Where indeed.

I went silent in April like a band off of a second album that failed to please the critics like their debut. I have been actively writing blog entries over a new medium that I call the ESPASHERE and if you have not master telepathy you are missing out on some funny shit. So what have I been up to other than hating on the authoritarians and scandalizing Florida with my yankee ways. Well that’s all tip top secret for now. I can say that I have been putting a lot of stress on my body cause it must be punished for loving chocolate and pizza. I have also been traveling a bit across this fantastic, oppressive, free, big brotheresque country of ours. Nebraska, Florida, Massachusetts, Colorado, California and probably Wisconsin unwittingly have all had my turds released into their mighty sewer systems, yes I am the modern Johnny Appleseed if my poo is apple seeds and my goal was to make trees grow not clog hotel crappers. But enough of this scatalogical warfare of words lets get on to the real matter at hand. Rapping. I like it. I learned how to do it using heroic couplets and I would like to kick it one time.

Keyboard check one two, 1, 2
uh uh yeah uh huh
we getting all qwerty in this mother fucker

Looking back at poems that I wrote in this book of old notes
for the first time in forever ago
I go on the hunt for something thought lost or sold
when I bought my first home
or I got my first dog
or I found my true love

I got settled I didn’t meddle in youthful discourse
over politics, police, pussy or wars
so I hung up these gloves
put away the stylo
close up the note book
and forgot the old crooks
forgave what the cunts took
and kept looking forward

tonight something snapped
now I write pen is back
I still have the attack
armed with facts and some apps
to help me find hacks and other such cats
who’ll fight back against rats
with badges and blue caps
and too much power at their back
who ask for respect that they lack

And I ain’t dead, or indebted, or incarcerated just yet.

New Bandalanch

Not to be confused with New Musicalpse.

I am secretly night djing. Pushing the beats at the captive audience. I don’t know if they are feeling my selections but I don’t give a fudrucker.

Neon Indian - Should Have Taken Acid With You

Tomorrows Bad Seeds - vices

K.Flay- “Nothing At All”

Max Romeo - Chase the Devil

Isbells - Reunite

Kolpakov Trio - Me Darava

Friday Photo: Homeless

Model: NIKON D5000
ISO: 320
Exposure: 32.3 sec
Aperture: 5.0
Focal Length: 18mm
Flash Used: No
Why I Took It: Cause it made me feel empty for a split second.

Fridays Photo: J.A.A.W.A.C.

Model: NIKON D5000
ISO: 320
Exposure: 15.1 sec
Aperture: 22.0
Focal Length: 70mm
Flash Used: No
Why I Took It: I tried to get the light trail from the subway which runs above ground here. It’s been a pretty dismal day and I was not to inspired. I felt like I had to keep the Friday Photo going though so out of the 50 I took this one was least meh.

Sweaty Little Angels

So I have been loosing myself. Every time I get off the floor of my local CrossFit gym and look at the sweat angel I made I smirk. The smirk comes from know that my ball were firmly placed against the wall and that my abs are one day closer to arriving. I feel stronger and fitter then I have in a great long time. I look into a mirror without wanting to punch the soft flabby white face staring back at me. In fact I look in the mirror take off my shirt and inspect my body for new bumps that I can try to flex. Right now you are probably vomiting into your mouth from all the self indulgent narcissism I am spewing but hear me out.

We are ruled by shapes. We stare into rectangles all day, we enjoy watching men run after, hit or try to carry spheres for relaxation and we all come to a halt at the sight of a red octagon, fuck inverted triangles though. So it is only natural that our own shape is the cause of many a frustration. If a woman is pear shaped most men steer clear. If she has what many of the gangsteratti call an apple bottom she is pursued. If that woman is an hourglass shape then, hubba hubba for lack of sillier words. The same goes for men, you have the barrels, the bean stalks, and the inverted triangles. We all have issues with our shape but we do not talk of them for fear of being called shallow or self absorbed. But what is wrong with that? What is wrong with caring how fit you are physically with how fit you are mentally? Why is it more acceptable to brag about how many lengthy and Oprah listed books you read then it is about how many pounds you can stack on your back and squat? My intelligencia friends will undoubtedly think because learning is hard and lifting is easy. I call bullshit, they are both hard, require repetition, training and proper technique.

So I am sick of my shape and am working toward a new one. When my abs finally get here I am throwing them a Welcome Home party to make sure they stick around.